Parenthood for Dummies
Being a father is a wild ride. My name is Christopher & these are my observations, theories & comments on life as the dad of my two boys Ripley & Jayden. I write this to air my thoughts & update my friends & family with photos, videos and such like. For everyone else I offer hints and tips on parenting as I learn them. For legal reasons I make no direct reference to my employer or any of my colleagues.
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on with the show...
most recent posts appear first in the list, then proceeding back in time, check "archives" section on left-hand sidebar for earlier posts
Tuesday, August 19, 2008
Ripley dancing to the wannadies - you and me song
Wednesday, August 13, 2008
Writing stuff down
Why have I started blogging again. As popular as the practice is, I like to think I am self aware enough to question my motives. Could it be for the ad revenue? No, that is in my wife's name and makes up part of the kids monthly trust fund payments. Could it be for fame? Not at all, I no more an exhibitionist than the next man. For your information, the next man is currently crushed against me on this London bound train. I think the reason I do what I do is simply to document.
Everything that is happening to me since me children arrived has changed my life, changed my work, changed my home, changed even the way I think. It has matured me, sadly :). I feel the urge to lock each moment away somewhere. So I lock it here.
How quickly you forget. Ripley is a boy now. As strange as it may seem to a non-parent but I never saw that coming. I don't think I did enough to document the little things, probably at the expense of a vaguely readable blog.
Take Jayjay, he has never been a good sleeper. Imagine what it is like to have to get up once or twice a night. Now imagine that task over 2 years of nights. There you go. Jay is not that unusual, probably at the higher end of the scale for seperation anxiety and bad dreams,
but still. The sudden cry jolting you awake like a cup of cold water down your back. Walking through the twilight. Stubbing your toe on the bed frame. Carefully getting Jay back to sleep. Having to calm Ripley down as he is now awake. Falling back into bed and drifting back to slee <waaaaaaaah>. Everyone is awake. Was that 1 minute or 2 hours. You don't know. All that you do know is the next day will even more fun as it takes you 3 hours to come online.
Jay and Ripley are laughing and giggling at breakfast. "Silly Daddy", laughes Ripley as I put milk in the sugar bowl.
And there you go. Madly in love with them again.
Monday, August 11, 2008
Baby bites dog shock
Damn damn and double damn. My little robot dog got it's front legs
broken by Jayden. Quite accidental. He just stumbled and fell on it.
When I heard the sickening crack I new it wasn't good. Weird thing
was the way the dog reacted. It fell over then seemed to convulse, I
am not suggesting it felt pain, that would be silly but it did have a
preprogrammed reaction to being squashed and broken. I turned it off
before it could damage itself any more.
If I could pick just one thing I own that I wouldn't want broken the
most, Aibo would be it.
I stayed composed and didn't shout at Jay, but I have to admit I
sulked for a good day and couldn't sleep worrying about if I could
ever get it fixed again.
My robot dog is a sony aibo ers-7 in white. They are very rare with
only a few thousand ever made, they are now discontinued. He is
completely artificially intelligent, sees, hears, touches,
photographs, emails people, even dances and plays mp3s from a wifi
jukebox. He is also a useful tool, I use him as a remote control unit
to see, speak, hear and walk around my house when I am not there. I
can also email him instructions to send me a photograph of the room he
is in or locate people and photograph them. Not really a toy, more
like a walking wifi laptop.
Luckily my home insurance covers the accident. Now all I have to do
is find a way of getting it repaired. I am in touch with the Sony
Aibo clinic and await more info as to whether he can be repaired. I
am a bit sad, not least because it has now increased in value to
around £1500. A bloody expensive accident.
I am considering buying Ripley a Pleo for his birthday, google it,
they are amazing. I hope that this robot dinosaur won't suffer the
same unfortunate accident!
Oh well. Just stuff. Not people. <Sniff>
I am on training in London this week. Currently heading home only to
be held up due to something or somebody on the line in wimbledon. A
more depressing end to the day for someone elses family I fear.
Sent from my mobile device
Friday, August 08, 2008
Tap tap, is this thing on?
Damn, its been a while. But I'm back baby, yeah!
Seeing as this site was physically removed from the interweb (phrase I
coined in 1996), I can't really expect any readers. But let's pretend
that I have some.
Hello again, you are probably wondering why I haven't blogged in such
a long time, why I have deleted most of the photos and videos of my
children and so on. It is complex but here goes.
My brother is autistic, we are not very close, but my Mother showed
him my blog and a funny photo of my sons covered in spagetti or some
such mess. He became obsessed with this image which for some reason
he found very disturbing. His condition means he hates mess and
disorder, perhaps it is for this reason that in his wisdom he called
the police talking about a "worrying photo", the police looked into it
and two things happened 1) He almost got himself arrested for wasting
police time, 2) I disowned my brother. Although I never really got to
the bottom of it, it has transpired that he doesn't like my
"materialistic lifestyle" and as a result seems to have developed some
fantasy vendetta against my family. This is a shock to me having only
exchanged Christmas and Birthday cards for the past 15 years and
hardly even met face to face. Long story short - I removed my blog for
security reasons. If it disappears again it will probably be due to
another of his disjointed reactions.
Why the change of heart, well, he is still a risk to me. But I won't
stop sharing my thoughts, proud moments, videos & photos (messy or
otherwise) on here because of him. He is not a part of my life so I
am damned if I will let him impact me in any way. I enjoy writing
this blog, don't know why, but I do.
So. Rip is 3 3/4 and Jay is 1 3/4. We are heading back from a trip
to visit my family in south west england. Jay is starting to make
meaningful sentences and Ripley is a cheeky monkey obsessed with
Dinosaurs and cbeebies (we limit the tv though).
More will come very soon.
Sent from my mobile device